Anime enjoyment writing motivation

Anime: Enjoyment, Motivation, and Writing

I’ve been wanting to write something like this for a long-ish time now. However, like most other things, I have been unable to find the words to express it in a way that both makes sense to me, and to those of you reading. Well… saying that, I don’t know if it will make sense, even now. Making sense isn’t something I’m all that well known for. Though, I will do my best.

I don’t know what to call this… a monologue on enjoyment, on motivation, and writing; all loosely linked to anime in some way or the other, and my often strange experiences with it.

 

Motivation

I think the concept of motivation is a good place to start and will act as a good base for everything I want to say thereafter.

I struggle with motivation.

I always have, at least during the parts of my life where I have needed it the most. Most days I ask myself, “How do I get more? Where is it hiding!?” As if it is something I can go and grab off the shelf at my local supermarket… of course, it isn’t. But then, what is it? And why does it feel like I have it in such fewer amounts than those around me?


Your Lie in April anime Kousei Arima black cat shadow


If I were to relate motivation to anime..: Maybe I struggle to finish shows that I genuinely enjoy. Maybe I don’t pay enough attention to the shows I’m currently watching. Maybe I just don’t watch anything because of the effort that takes. Motivation – or the lack thereof – has too much of an influence in my life. It permeates through everything I do, and everything I try to do. It’s a problem, though, I don’t know how big of a problem. I don’t know how different this makes me to the majority of the population, if at all. That’s the thing, isn’t it? It’s impossible to say if you are unique or common because there is no ‘standard’ level of experience in life.

The only perspective is a personalised, individual one.

I won’t say modern technology is the cause of this contention, and conflict within ourselves (these things have always existed in one form or another). Neither do I believe social media and the quick turnover/consumption of content/media plays a large part in what a person does and becomes. Of course, it influences many things, both positive and negative – I’m no exception to that. Still, humans have a knack for adapting, that’s why we’re all here now. Why you’re able to read this on a screen thousands of miles away. Social Media has helped me get to grips with the wider community, and therefore with some of the issues within the industry. Also, not discounting the enjoyment I get from interacting with all of you, (Follow me on Twitter, so you can do exactly that!) something which makes me feel just that bit warmer on the colder days.

 

Do I Enjoy Anime…?

The short answer… yes.

The long answer… a little more complicated.

I can confidently say I haven’t been watching anime for as long as a lot of you have. Seasonally, I’ve only been watching for about a year and a half. Of course, in the years previously, I watched a fair number of both films and shows, but not a great deal in any sense. As a result, I don’t know anywhere near as much as I’d like to when it comes to anime. Specifically the business side of things: the studios, the staff, and the visionaries. I don’t regularly comment on these things, because I can’t…

That bothers me.

I’d like to be more involved; to play a larger part in this side of the community. To understand more deeply the people involved in anime; then watch more from the people I enjoy, respect, and am inspired by. This is something I’m slowly walking towards. Although, at first it may seem like something trivial, my inability to focus on any one thing for too long, or with enough attention turns it into something of a chore – the very last thing I want it to be. I don’t exactly know why this is. There are many reasons I can guess, all of which put together form a primordial soup of hell. All of which makes me angry. It’s a strange feeling: Not enjoying the things you want to enjoy, the things you know you’re able to enjoy.


via GIPHY


I want to sit down, go through the dozens of shows and films on my to-watch-list, and simply enjoy them, watch them without being distracted by a million other things…  Looking back on the anime I have watched, I can count those I’ve fully enjoyed, on one hand, the others all being forgettable to varying degrees, and in varying manners. This goes well beyond anime. It stands for everything in my life.  It is as though I’m swimming in an ocean of mediocrity –  a world with so few islands it’s hard to place my feet on solid ground, and hard to move off that ground when I do eventually find it. Usually, it comes down to three pieces in each respective medium. The firsts of which I understand with 90% certainty will remain in their positions until the day I die.

If that sounds arrogant and pessimistic, it’s because it is.

 

Anime Film Games
Welcome to the N.H.K (500) Days of Summer Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice
Evangelion Lost in Translation The Talos Principle
Haruhi Suzumiya Full Metal Jacket Metro: (Franchise)

*In order

Things don’t impress me. Not because I demand too much, nor because of the quality of what I’m consuming. But because of something more elusive, something which resides in the shadows of my mind where I can only see the silhouettes positioned against every other brilliant thing I’ve watched. Then, I realise it… The vast majority of these things I experienced over five years ago, in my mid-teen years. In a time when my life had no purpose, where everything just… was, situations and people existing because they just… were. I tried even less with things than I do now, something which in retrospect I cannot bend my mind around. And yet, there I was: Doing nothing, not trying to do anything, sitting in a puddle of my own self-contempt and fear in literally everything and everyone. It felt as though all I had was the media I consumed – constantly searching for the next thing, the next ‘experience’ I can parse pieces of my within. A percentage of this outlook carries over to today. I’m trying to shake it. I promise.

Until then, I search through the vast, vast libraries of anime, looking for something that can make me feel… something.

Writing… and Trying to Write

Currently, I’m studying English Literature and Creative writing at university, something which will be my life for the next three years (I had to do an extra year because of terrible exam results previously, but that’s fine). I am doing it because it is the only thing I want to do. Quite possibly the only thing I can do. It’s impossible to conceive of anything else at the moment.

Maybe those who have been with me from the start know I used to write another blog, so this is not a new thing to me. Though, Peach’s Almanac has become much more than I ever thought it would, and we’re only a year in! I thank you you for that! It has become a very important aspect of my life – something I don’t want to change, ever.

I’ve been writing for a while. Before the blog, (and of course after) I’ve written with varying degrees of seriousness since I was around sixteen (I’m almost twenty-two now): Short stories, novel attempts, and poetry. None of which were brilliant by any stretch of the imagination, most of which weren’t even acceptable. However, it’s not the result that matters, it is trying, and the not giving up on trying which is so imperative. Eventually, the results will fall in place.

The only way to get better at writing is by writing.

A notion that applies to everything else in life. I look back even two years at my writing, and the embarrassment I feel reading it is beyond belief, the same goes for my content on this blog – the quality of posts now contrasted with when I started. Change like this happens without notice. It’s only when you look back you understand how much further down the road you’ve travelled. Though, don’t think you’re closer to the destination, for the road has no destination, no end. I wouldn’t want it any other way.


via GIPHY


 

Let me know your sweet, sweet thoughts!?

Thanks for reading, as always!

-Chris (Follow me on Twitter, and consider supporting Peach’s Almanac on Patreon!)

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16 thoughts on “Anime: Enjoyment, Motivation, and Writing

  1. tetrax4berium says:

    It’s really nice for you to share with us your personal thoughts on your jouney and personal growth. I’m sure many of us find ourselves criticising and depreciating their own work in one way or another as we try to work towards a state of ideality preimagined by ourselves. It’s a good thing because you have a vision, and you found the gap too.
    I’m sure that you will be able to continue to achieve even greater heights whether in blogging or IRL, as you keep moving forward.. and with the chance opportunity, and with the spontaneous sparks of inspirations.
    Hope this piece can motivate other wp readers to venture beyond their comfort zones and work towards betterment as you have. 🙂

    Keep Calm and Write ^^

    • Chris says:

      I’m glad you enjoyed reading! I hope all of those things too. If by sharing I’m able to help anyone in the community by the slightest amount, that would be amazing.

      Thank you! 🙂

  2. WeeaBroDerek says:

    “Change like this happens without notice. It’s only when you look back you understand how much further down the road you’ve travelled. Though, don’t think you’re closer to the destination, for the road has no destination, no end. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

    Ain’t that the truth.

  3. Jenn says:

    I really enjoyed reading this…thanks for sharing. I definitely relate to the lack of motivation, and the “not fully being able to enjoy things” feeling. It’s nice to know someone is in the same boat.

    Personally, I do feel that writing has motivated me a lot…it was hard to start, but now I feel myself improving & even learning things about myself as I write. It’s a nice feeling, even if my blog isn’t that big or in-depth right now, it feels worth it 🙂 & I’m glad that writing seems to be doing a similar thing for you, too 🙂

    • Chris says:

      Thanks for reading, I’m glad you enjoyed! It is a nice feeling, and I don’t know what I’d do without my writing, these days it’s so integral to who I am. 🙂

  4. moyatori says:

    This post is relatable in many ways (also an English lit. student here 🙂). Wouldn’t be the owner of a moya-moya moratorium if I don’t worry about these things.
    So many things to focus on in this life, but so few to actually be able to specialize in. Mediocrity bothers me as well, and I think it bothers anyone who writes with some extent of seriousness. I used to feel like if you don’t excel at something you love, you either give up or keep trying until you excel. But how to define excellence, and where does enjoyment fit in?
    I don’t know where I’m going with this mini rant. I guess we all should just keep writing, like you said. And I continue to enjoy your writing style~

    • Chris says:

      That’s all true. I’ve never excelled at any one thing. I’ve tried art, I could be worse. I semi-play the guitar. I can decently cook. Yet, I could never do any of these things to a high-level. Maybe after thousands of hours practice… (I know that’s how people excel) but then, I can’t muster the motivation and drive for that. They’re all strange feelings. The only thing I’ve ever done for a long period of time is writing. So, I stick with that! 😀 Thanks for reading, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts! 🙂

      • moyatori says:

        I also have to blame the fact that life is too short. And darn, we have to spend 1/3 of it unconsciously asleep! 😡 I really don’t know how people manage to find thousands of hours to dedicate to a particular thing.

        • Chris says:

          Yeah, exactly. I think certain people are predisposed for these things: the focus, the commitment, visualising what they want to be in the future, and making solid steps to get there. Others, like me, don’t have a clue what’s happening next week… 😀

  5. LitaKino says:

    Good to see you back Chris at it again. Great personal piece on three things all us bloggers, writers struggle with. Most one I’m struggling with right now is motivation, hate the need from things I watch. The need to write about them, then makes not want to write about it, too many ideas build up. To rectify this I blog about what’s currently on my mind honestly, and making promises about things I’ll write about. I enjoy what I do blogging about anime and need to work on more focusing on it. Nothing will change for me writing about anime.

    • Chris says:

      That’s why my post are so infrequent. I’d love to push out 2-3 a week, but I just can’t find that much to give it. I do enjoy blogging, though not as much as I’d like to enjoy it, if I were honest. But that’s a whole other issue that trancends the blog. Thanks for reading! 🙂 Nice to see everyone around again! 😀

  6. kimchisama says:

    Sometimes I think that motivation is a lie when I realize I have none of it. I hope you keep watching and enjoying anime. Sometimes writing about things you love can turn them into a chore. I think it can be a fine line to walk with something like this. Thank you for sharing your journey and I think you found a place where a lot of us are on the same one! That is a nice feeling to have since sometimes during our struggles it can feel very lonely.
    I hope I made some sort of sense and I’m happy to see you again.

  7. Arthifis says:

    This was a really sweet, sweet post! I mean, probably that was not the idea since the subject is rather serious, but the way you wrote it just made it all so… Sweet 🙂

    I do have some thoughts on what you have written, mainly my own experience and some “tips” if you could call that lolol

    First the motivation… I think that everyone one way or another feel lack of motivation. It’s just normal right? There is a youtuber I watched a lot some years ago called iisuperwomanii (you probably know who she is since she is BIG) and I’ve learnt a lot about how to self-motivate through her videos.

    For me, it all comes from self talk. I go and talk and boss myself around! No, not think! I really talk! I go and say to myself “You are going to quit your bitching and you are going to do x and y and z. When you end those and you have time, then you get to play a little bit! If not, it’s bed with you and I don’t even want to hear your whining”

    Something like that and it normally it helps! It really makes me feel more “on” and ready to put my hands into work! 🙂

    Regarding enjoying Anime. I’m like you honestly. Although I’ve probably watched more anime than you I never, like ever, got interested to know the voice actresses, studios and things like that. To be honest it’s still something that I’m not interested into know it!

    I watch Anime to enjoy myself and I blog about that as a hobby, so I just do it my way. Even if blogging started to be my job I would do it the same way! The reason is simple, if it stops to be fun I will just stop it all together and just do a job inside my career path and do things that I don’t really like about it ahah

    Sometimes I don’t get a part of the plot and things like that and I don’t care. My opinion will be about that! You can say that I try to review Anime as a viewer and not a blogger. What I mean with this is that, contrary to a blogger who tries to check all details, I’m more in the side of someone who would just watch the Anime for the sake for it!

    Yeah, my posts probably are not as good as other blogger when it comes to details, but at least i’m enjoying xD

    Sorry, really long post >.< Concluding, just do you and do what makes you happy! This is your blog and your writing place. You are the boss, so you decide what you want to write and how. When it comes to motivation, try pep talk yourself up in the mirror xD It’s not stupid if it works right (?)

    • Chris says:

      Thank you for the comment! And, don’t be sorry for it being long – it’s the best being able to hear everyone else’s perspectives! 😀 You’re right, it’s always good to tell yourself to do things, even if you’re feeling like shit (which is most of the time for me…) And, you do feel better for doing those things, just doing something. It’s also great that everyone takes a different stand on their blogging, it would be horribly boring to read the same things all the time! 🙂

  8. Jon Spencer says:

    I wrote a similar piece awhile back and enjoyed reading your take on this. Sorry it took me a little longer to get to this, “later this evening” since I played Yakuza when I got home and nearly forgot XD

    Your right though, you just gotta write!

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